The question was recently bantered about the break room, "How old does a bag of M&Ms have to be for them to be inedible?"

No one could answer, but we do know our department's vending machine has (or had, since I haven't tried again) M&Ms so old that if you break one in half it's innards are a pale beige. Hint: It should be dark, chocolate brown.

So I've formulated a theory: Being a department of nerds, they're rotating stock that doesn't sell well through our machine. "The geeks... they'll eat anything." I expect they'd say.

Sadly, this is true. But we'd rather the junk be fresh, and not some other company's rejects.

On a tangent, I've noticed our vending machine has Snickers bars with the NFL logo on them, and a "Vote For Hungriest Player & WIN!" on the label.

I'm about as likely to speculate and then vote for the hungriest player in the NFL as I am to vote for the man capable of producing the largest bowel movement in, say, NASCAR or the sweatiest extra from the cast of The Lord of the Rings.

Some contests just aren't in the cards, baby.